No Fair!!

Alright kids, today I would like to talk about something I am sure none of you have a problem with… It’s just something I need to get out… Actually it’s something very important. Today I want to talk about Jealousy, you don’t have any right? Didn’t think so. I would like to clarify, what I am talking about isn’t just the “I am jealous that my friend isn’t spending as much time with me as she used to.” jealous. I am talking about that little voice that pops into your head saying “No fair”, and I would like to admit I definitely let that voice over take me from time to time. Maybe even on weekly or biweekly basis. This is the voice that seems to pop up when you have been working, praying, and sweating over something, like school, your career, or even spiritual gifts. And someone else breezes by you, seeming to not even sweat a drop. This jealousy kills your day! It kills friendships, and it kills your witness. I don’t care if you hide it well… I can assure you, if you are constantly saying “No fair!” Jesus love is probably not coming out of you. After all love is not jealous right? (1 Cor 13:4) I admit one of my biggest and most reoccurring sins is probably this. God has put very specific boundaries, in a certain area of my life. Some that not everyone has been called to, and I always seem to catch myself saying “No fair God, why can’t I do that!!”. Also I have know what ministry I am supposed to do since seventh grade, and sometimes I will meet someone who just found out they have a similar calling, and just step up and breeze by me. Rocketing to where I would love to be by now. “No fair!”, right? Wrong, wrong, wrong!!!! That is not love!! And it’s not even really true! I have been separated from certain things for many reasons, my ministry being one of them. My calling and yours may be “the same” but, God has a very different and specific plan for me. Different than yours, but both are very important to God, and very close to His heart. You want to know what hides deep in the “No fair” voice? Pride, anger, worry, and unthankfulness. Thats right, when you say “No fair” to God, you are saying “Hey God, your not being fair, I want more! Your plans are not in good timing. I don’t want your plan for me. I want something “better”". Ouch!! Do you want to know how to get rid of this awful mindset? Two words, that it! Just two simple words. “Thank you.” Just sit on that for awhile, think about it. Thank you. Phil 4:6-7 “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. If you do this, you will experience God’s peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” “God thank you, thank you for this day, thank you for this meal, thank you for this opportunity, thank you for my friends, thank you for the opportunities they are getting. Bless them!” I mean, how amazing does that feel. How relieving. I mean just take a deep breathe. Don’t you feel lighter? It draws you so much deeper to God. And its an act of Love.

I am going to let you go on that. Really pray into this. I feel like sometimes we think of it as a small issue, when it is in fact very important, and very key to a deeper intimacy with God. There is so much more revelation in this, but I am nannying and someone just woke up.

Just a little side note I am reading a book called “all I need is Jesus and good pair of jeans.” By Susanna Foth Aughtmon. its a simple read and about everyday things that put wedges in between us and God. It has really helped me see and overcome, the things blocking me from intimacy with God.

Have a great life!

Allie E. Doss

A Call To Offend

In my life growing up I was always nice, not necessarily polite… But always nice. There were rare occasions where I would say things without thinking about them, and I would offend someone… But never on purpose. It was always an issue. I saw the best in people, and many times ignored the worst, and it would get me in bad, dangerous, situations. I didn’t want to offend so badly that I would always put my heart and my relationship with God on the line. I also always put how young I was in front of God. Crying out to Him, “I am too young to do what you are asking, and I don’t want to grow up!” It honestly was not an excuse. I felt young and stupid, and in my mind knowledge and growing up always produced pride, following a big painful fall.

Now the word of the Lord came to me, saying,
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
and before you were born I consecrated you;
I appointed you a prophet to the nations.”
Then I said, “Ah, Lord God! Behold, I do not know how to speak, for I am only a youth.” But the Lord said to me,
“Do not say, ‘I am only a youth’;
for to all to whom I send you, you shall go,
and whatever I command you, you shall speak.
Do not be afraid of them,
for I am with you to deliver you,
declares the Lord.” ESV Jeremiah 1:4-8

You can’t be in a relationship with God and not offend. It is impossible! It’s apathetic! And it’s down right stupid for us to think that we can. We are to be the light in a world of darkness. You can’t be a light and please the dark. Which mean I think you are going to be a little offensive.

Then the Lord put out his hand and touched my mouth. And the Lord said to me,
“Behold, I have put my words in your mouth.
See, I have set you this day over nations and over kingdoms,
to pluck up and to break down,
to destroy and to overthrow,
to build and to plant.”
And the word of the Lord came to me, saying, “Jeremiah, what do you see?” And I said, “I see an almond branch.” Then the Lord said to me, “You have seen well, for I am watching over my word to perform it.”
The word of the Lord came to me a second time, saying, “What do you see?” And I said, “I see a boiling pot, facing away from the north.” Then the Lord said to me, “Out of the north disaster shall be let loose upon all the inhabitants of the land. For behold, I am calling all the tribes of the kingdoms of the north, declares the Lord, and they shall come, and every one shall set his throne at the entrance of the gates of Jerusalem, against all its walls all around and against all the cities of Judah. And I will declare my judgments against them, for all their evil in forsaking me. They have made offerings to other gods and worshiped the works of their own hands. But you, dress yourself for work; arise, and say to them everything that I command you. Do not be dismayed by them, lest I dismay you before them. And I, behold, I make you this day a fortified city, an iron pillar, and bronze walls, against the whole land, against the kings of Judah, its officials, its priests, and the people of the land. They will fight against you, but they shall not prevail against you, for I am with you, declares the Lord, to deliver you.” ESV Jeremiah 1:9-19

Can you imagine God telling you these things? I don’t think God is going to tell you stuff this important if you are an unoffensive person. I challenge you to check yourself. Are you pleasing people? Or God. Being offensive does not mean you have to be a jerk. actually you are to always show Gods love, but if God is telling you something… And your beating around the bush because you don’t want to offend, you may want to pray into that a little. Just learn your Fathers voice, and if you don’t know how to present something, ask Him how. And if you mess up a few time don’t fall apart. Just return to your Father, sit in His lap, and talk to Him. Taking your troubles and fears to your daddy creates relationship, He loves it! It also takes gossip out of your life. And after a while you are so close to your Daddy, you really won’t care what people think.

May God bless you yet stab you in the heart.

Have a great life!

Allie E. Doss

Live Like A Tree. A Tree Of Life.

I was on my porch a few days ago, just soaking in this amazing new fall weather; Enjoying an amazing lunch of tomato soup and grilled cheese, when God hit me with some revelation. I should be living like a tree. Tree’s live to worship God in everything they do, and they don’t question when to do it, or how to do it. They bloom when asked to bloom, they sway to the winds music when asked to. Joining in with their own wispy voices. They don’t envy the tree next door, or covet what color they turn, or count how many flowers they get. They just worship. When they are going through their season of death, they take it. Knowing spring will come and they will beautifully bloom once again. And you know what? I find that when all their leaves (possessions) are dying and falling off, that is when they are most beautiful. Sometimes Trees need to be pruned.. Sometimes trees get attached by bugs. Trees grow deep in the earth supplying nutrients to all kinds of other things. They plant seeds and help grow other things. Trees need light, water, and vitamins. Put a tree in the dark and it will die. Even with light, water, and vitamins; trees eventually die… But they create something to live off of for all kinds of other things. Trees have faith like a mustard seed.Trees depend on God! They don’t question His authority. Their whole life is a act of worship to God. I think, we should learn a lesson from trees.

May God bless you, yet stab you in the heart.

Have A Great Life!
-Allie

Writing a song.

The guitar is the rhythm of my breath slowly letting go of lies, The piano is the passion I can’t show through my eyes. The drums show the arrhythmia your love causes, and the bass brings it all down low from whence it started. A symphony of melodies trying to convey emotion. Something that goes beyond language, and inspires motion. A breathe of freedom, a passion burning, A heart turning. It doesn’t matter. The instruments flow through you, taking all your burdens as they go; but also giving. Giving a spirit of longing. Longing, to find someway to use the breath in you to express what your body is living through. That’s where lyrics come in. Telling the story, so the public can feel not only the emotions, but live the story. To become desperate with you. To fall on their knees and realize the same love you have come to feel. A love you can taste, feel, smell, see, become, believe. A love you can cry to. A love you can smile to. A love to live through. You only hope the lyrics capture it, but how can you capture infinity in a few words? You can’t, but you will try.

Just a little update.

I know I’m hard to count on,
Forget half what I’m told.
You probably only know my voice from,
this stupid microphone.

No school, no job, and not much music…. This equals not what I planned my life being when I was a little girl..
Of coarse I didn’t think I would be pursuing music…
I have also come to realize I am going to be hard to live with unless I start cleaning more often.
My room is so unorganized!!!
Its just so hard to clean when there is a guitar, keyboard, music and a pen sitting by.
My artistic ways are getting the better of me!!

I feel like I am going two steps forward three steps back.
I also still have that same fear of getting lost behind the microphone.
Which I guess brings me to one of the bigger things that has happened since last blog.
My uncle in Tx. Recorded two of my songs. Exciting!

I have really gotten to know things I really need to be working on these past few weeks.
Like just living a more outwardly passionate life for God.
I want people I pass to know without me saying a word, that I love God more than anything.
And I want Gods glory to shine in everything I do. I could tell you thats how I live…. But that would be a lie.
I don’t know many people who do live that way. Which is sad, God loves us so very much, and we shut Him in a closet. Only taking Him out when we want to. I should be living for Him, and Him alone. Not just saying I am.

That pretty much sums up my life right now.
Pretty boring I know… But at least I am not in school.

May God bless you, yet stab you in the heart….

Have a great life!!

-Allie

Is Love a fancy or a feeling.

Countless romantic books and movies, billions of songs, we even get our kids started on it through Disney princess. But does that even really exist? I mean they show Cinderella getting married on this super fantastic emotional high, but they don’t show when a few weeks later she discovers her perfect prince has a snoring problem… I mean is this thing we today call love really what love is? Or is it an emotional high we get over, and just hope we have a good friendship with the handsome prince afterward.

Is there one person you are destine to fall in love with? Or is it just the first person you finally buckle down and decide to stick through think and thin with.
I wonder if for woman it really is just a safety thing? Is it just whoever pursues you the longest?
Showers you with the best complement and gifts until you can’t say no? For men is it just a challenge? Something you see, and want?

Now after I have said all this, God has kinda revealed some stuff.
“You love me right?” He says. Yes of course I do, I mean yes there is security, there is an emotional high; but even without that emotion, there is still this love, this pride I have for Him; And honestly as I have been filled with His spirit the “emotional high” has become an ever present feeling. I honestly catch myself giggling at His love for me, blushing at His beauty. Sounds a bit like a crush if you ask me. Also, God pursues me, He has a jealously for my love and attention like no other, He spent time creating each finger, each cell, each hair. He made me desirable. I mean WOW! That is love! And then he made that love tangible to people. This is such a beautiful thought its almost to hard to explain, so sorry for the jumping around.
He made man and woman to show His realationship to us on earth. To show us that love. I mean He made man from earth, can you imagine, a human from dirt. And then saw Adam was incomplete, so He made Eve, (beautiful, pure) from part of Adams very own body! One of His ribs, something that protects His heart. So does that mean all of us girls have our own Adam’s rib? A specific guys heart? Maybe, maybe not, but that sure is a really romantic thought.
We, (man and woman) are both in a way incomplete, and then through marriage, sewn together through the Spirit and a Holy covenant. Then we become a servant of God. I mean this is just beautiful picture!
Something to remember, The Spirit is just as ,No, more important than your spouse. I mean yes, we are a complete person… But we need that glue, that binding agent to make us complete.
I mean think, yes Adam met Eve and they where one… But lets not forget who made this whole thing to begin with. God needs to be the center.

Now I don’t think you need to just put your life on hold and wait for your man or woman, God is going to use you no matter what. But it does leave something to be excited for.

Maybe you are thinking, but Allie… you said yourself, the whole Cinderella act doesn’t last…
Yes, it doesn’t but I don’t think her and Prince Charming had the Spirit guiding them. You have to remember, the Holy Spirit can heal snoring.

Have A Great Life!!

Allie E. Doss

Dating God.

“Here I am here I stand take a picture of my hand bet you can tell it’s not manicured.
Here I am half a man I’m not a doctor I’m not tan and I never help the score.
I drive to fast, the team picked me last, I break the rules and like it.
My body curves, I forget the words, I missed the serve and lost it.
All my flaws to see, you, you still love, love me.
Here I am face down sometimes I smile, sometimes I frown but it depends on the time of the day.
Here I go off the road, I spend cash on my clothes when I still have bills to pay.
My skin isn’t clear, haven’t spoke in a year, ’cause I still have fear I’m trying to overcome.
My truths aren’t right, and my jeans are to tight, when I pick a fight I turn around and;
all my flaws to see, you still love, love me.” -Flaws, Caitlin Crosby.

I just ended a Nine month dating fast, in that nine months I grew up. God has shown me so much. I grew up with the mind set, oh I need to find a guy! Then, and only then will I be whole. He has shown me that common mind set is truly wrong. He has shown me that I am a woman whole by myself, in Him. He died to make me whole and alive. How beautiful, I fully doubt any guy I meet will love me with the kind of love God has for me. Although I truly look forward to the day God bring someone into my life. I am definitely fine with waiting. Its hard, I don’t know how hard it is for you men, but let me tell you. Woman from my conversations thrive for that personal relationship. For me it’s not the physical, or even the romance. Its is that amazing friendship you receive. Dang! I want it so bad, it sometimes physically hurts. When I felt this way I used to pop in a chick flick, which would make it worse. Sometimes tears would even come out. Now I pray for my future husband and the strength to feel whole. I read the bible, and worship Him. It also truly helps to write a song, but maybe that’s just me.

I am currently listening to a series on the song of Solomon The Peasant Princess by Mark Driscoll.
Man, It is awesome I truly urge you to listen to it. It has really just given me satisfaction to wait. Because there is an awesome man out there for me, and God is preparing to rock both our lives. It is going to be awesome. He is going to be awesome. I am so excited to meet him. He will be my rock and protector, he will be an AMAZING Christ follower, and he will be smoking… At least to me. Through God we will change the world for Him, no joke. I just know we will. But for now, I will be full of God. There is no room for anyone else. He is calling me to grow up right now, and that in itself is enough to fill up my life. Just know if you are ever feeling like half a person, that spot isn’t for a man or woman. Its for God. And that is just an awesome thought. I am Not “single”… I am dating God. ^_^

Have A Great Life!

-Allie E. Doss.

I just want to scream!!!!!!!

I am so uncontrollably happy! The Holy Spirit has rapped me with this cloak of warmth, I can’t help but smile.
I can’t help but sing, if not out loud in my head. Its just there! This unending worship service. I don’t know what to do with myself. I just want to be locked in a room with a guitar and piano and sing and write forever!
Just love songs for God, I am so captivated by Him.

I just want to do this! but at the same time I don’t. I am afraid, of people. Not really what they think. Just the thought of maybe being changed for the worse by a crowd of people. I can just imagine my love and passion for God and music draining away. It scares me.

I know I should not be afraid. But even if I where fearless…. Where would I start. I am so impatient, I am as impatient as I am scared. AARRRGGGGGG!!!! WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO!! This makes me go from having an amazingly happy day to not so happy….

Its really hard to take it day by day… But I am! I trust God. If i am supposed to do something with my music it will happen.

Have a great life!!

-Allie

Don’t put me in a box.

“I’m sick and tired of making faces, nothing more than second places, I’m coming ’round the bend but I am crawling slowly. When everyone around is rising raise your glass to compromising. Tell me now is this what we call freedom?” -Freedom (Caitlin Crosby)

I have always wanted to change the world. I remember my prayer before I went to bed consisted of having criminals come to Christ, solving world hunger, and finding a cure for cancer. I went through wanting to be a doctor, astronaut, marine biologist, and many more life saving jobs

Now I am 18 I am graduating high-school barely but I am. I refuse to take the SAT for many reasons. One being I really don’t want to know how dumb I am compared to everyone else. I am completely right brained meaning I could write you a poem, song, or draw you a picture and blow your head off, but when put in a room for a test in any school subject I seem to completely lose my brain. I know I am not “stupid”. God created me with a unique perspective on things, He wanted me to be out of the box. But today’s school systems and job opportunities call it “stupid” and say that I need drugs to tone down my energy and concentrate, Then I will be “normal”. The enemy just keep pushing me down, telling me I’m not good enough.

“Allie you are worth nothing, your music and jewelry designs do nothing to the world. Allie you don’t change the world at all! You don’t make it better, in fact you may just make it worse.” ” What? You don’t know the answer to that? HAH! You are even more worthless than I thought!”

I have had those words in my head my whole life, sometimes I just want to give up and go home. But I know God created me with a purpose so I just keep seeking what He created me to do. Lately I have really been concentrating on music. Over and over again God has confirmed this calling in my life. I just need to figure out where it fits in. Hopefully sooner than later, I still have no job and money is starting to run out. I really cannot describe my hatred for money. I hate making it, spending it, and the smell of it.

Whew, I’m glad I got all of that off my chest.

Have a great life!

Allie E. Doss

Lightning, Stars, Thunder, And the Man On The Moon.

I feel like I can’t explain what has happened in my head tonight, but I will try.

We where suppose to go to a Good Friday service at 7:00Pm, at the Verizon Wireless Amphitheater with Chris Tomlin, Israel Houghton & New Breed, Louie Giglio, Matt Redman & Christy Nockels. there came a huge storm… so they were forced to postponed the service until 9:00Pm

As the storm started coming in, I went outside to watch. How amazing is God! How creative is He!
To create such a powerful, changing, unpredictable, and humbling thing called weather. I am truly humbled.
However, as the storm comes closer I realize the time, and that we will not be able to drive through this and get to the amphitheater.

Tick tock tick tock… The clock runs on unforgiving. I finally give up on the hope of going to the concert I had looked forward to for weeks. O’well whatever happens, happens right? About 9:30 the weather cools down and my dad decides we should give going a try since we had the tickets anyways. The drive was beautiful as I looked at the sky and to one side of the car saw lightning, rain, and thunder; and to the other the stars and moon . We arrive about half way through (10:30) as Louie Giglio is finishing his sermon, but even catching the last of his words hit me. For some reason God has shown me what I am suppose to do! After all the praying finally! But to do what he asks requires me to conquer fear I don’t really feel like facing at this time. I’m quite comfy in my little bubble. Then Chris Tomlin, Matt Redman, and Christy Nockels started worshiping, and I realize how many people came despite of the weather.

So, after some AMAZING worship we head to our car (about midnight) and start our journey home. My dad starts talking about how Louie Giglio and this one guy (i dont remember his name) went shark hunting once when they where 16. it’s an amazing story my dad says as he searches through his Cd (he had the sermon in the car) so we listen to the story and of course… What is the sermon on? Courage. Ok God! I get it now.
Listening to fear is just letting Satan conquer us. And we will always be scared if we don’t take a chance, that fear is never just going to go away;but with God shouldn’t that fear go away? I really don’t know it’s just something that I wanted to get out. Any thoughts?

Have A Great Life!

-Allie